The Whiniest Girl in America

Dear Em,
We were in the midst of a typical cranky morning getting you ready for the day. You didn't want to get dressed. You didn't want to fix your hair. You didn't want to brush your teeth. In case we didn't already know all this by your uncooperative manner, you let us know by crying & whining & yelling. You know, a typical morning, the kind of morning that makes me want to hide under the covers until you turn four & hope that whining was just a three year old phase.

I had been trying to coax you into opening your mouth so that I could brush your teeth for almost five minutes when Daddy walked in. "Hey Emma, I just got off the phone. I can't believe it. Guess what, you won! You won whiniest girl in America!" He began to sing, "There she is, the whiniest girl in America..."

You looked up at Daddy with wide eyes. "I won?! I can't believe it. I won," you said excitedly.

I looked up at Daddy. This was obviously not how we thought this conversation would go. I don't think he thought you were going to be excited about being the whiniest girl in America. Little does he know, you're excited to win anything. Seriously, anything. Every time we walk up the stairs you declare, "I'm going to beat you!"

You ran out of the bathroom excited to share your new title with your best friend. "Hey S, guess what! I won!" I gave Daddy a "well, that backfired look." At least you weren't whining anymore...well, that is until S declared that she was actually whiniest girl in America & then you both whined over the title.

The next morning we were again in the throes of getting ready again when you all of a sudden looked up at me & said "well, do you know Daddy is a liar?" What?! "I didn't actually win anything," you told me sadly.

I guess you & Daddy had a heart to heart the evening before as he put you to bed. You were whining, of course (lucky for us, it's not something you save only for mornings, you share it with us the whole day through). Daddy asked you if you would just use your words. He explained how much people dislike listening to whining (especially Daddy & I). You shot back, "but I won the award!" I wasn't there for this conversation, but I can imagine Daddy trying so very hard not to laugh at that comment.

"Emma, it wasn't a real award. You don't want to be whiniest girl in America, because people don't like to listen to whining."

"So, I didn't win?" I imagine your face must have been so serious & so sad.

"No."

"So, you were just teasing me?"

"Yes."

You explained the conversation to me that next morning. You were crushed about losing what you thought was your rightful award. I suggested you try to help me get you ready in the morning (you know, instead of fighting me tooth & nail the whole way), & you could win the Extra-Special-Helper-Getting-Readier Award. It might not be an Olympic event, but if it helps with our mornings I will erect a trophy.

Unfortunately, your excitement over the new award was short lived. Three days ago you cried in your room while we were supposed to be getting ready for our day. When I asked you why you were crying you said you didn't know. When I asked you if you wanted to stop crying since you were crying for no reason you said resoundingly, "NO!" I explained that it didn't make sense, but you were too busy crying to care. How do you reason with that?!

Yesterday, you spent 15 minutes in your room whining in a high pitched shriek. "I don't like it," you whined over & over & over, because I had laid out a turtle neck for you to wear underneath you short sleeved dress. When I finally went to help you get dressed, you were still standing in your underwear. You wanted time for reading before leaving for school, but I explained to you that when it takes twenty minutes just to get you dressed we don't have extra time for reading. Somehow you believe that this is my fault.

I have enacted a no whining rule in our house, but that hasn't really worked. So, I'm going to go back to option B, which is hiding under my covers until you turn four. I would also go with option C, hoping that Mary Poppins will glide down to my house with her umbrella & work her magic. But it's probably going to end up being option D, buying earplugs.

I love you so, even when you're at your whiniest,
Mommy

childhood friends

Dear Em,
Growing up as a Navy Brat, it was hard to develop long term childhood friends. I'm sometimes a little jealous that your daddy is still friends with kids he's known since kindergarten. He & his best friend basically grew up together. I don't even know know one person I went to kindergarten with, which isn't really surprising because I think I attended kindergarten at three different school systems.

Before moving to Rhode Island, Connecticut was the state I lived in for the longest. I was in the same school system from third grade through the end of my sophomore year in high school. I may not have known people since kindergarten, but I finally had the chance to grow up with people. We ran around playgrounds together. We wore awkward clothing together. We stayed up all night at sleepovers together.

But then my family moved.

I started all over in a new state & new school system my junior year of high school. It was hard at first, but I made some really amazing new friends. If it hadn't been for one of those friends, I would have never toured URI on New Jersey day. I wouldn't have fallen in love with the campus or met your daddy or had you. So, I'm thankful that my family made that move, because it led me to you.

Still, it's sometimes a bummer for me that I didn't graduate with my high school class in Connecticut. I didn't get to go to prom with all my best girlfriends. I didn't get to finish my senior year on a cheerleading squad with the girls I had first begun cheerleading with. I didn't get to paint one of the school bricks in our school hallways. I didn't get my friends to sign my very last yearbook, you know, the friends that I had truly grown up with. I didn't get to do the things that we had grown up together dreaming about. And as much as we tried to write letters & call on occasion in the first years (back then snail mail & expensive long distance phone calls were our only options), I mostly lost touch with all my best friends from childhood.

That was one of the amazing things about moving back to Rhode Island. I was able to reconnect with many of my childhood friends. We share our lives via facebook & sometimes text conversations, & we've been able to get together too. The past few years some of us have gotten together annually with our kids in tow. This year four of us met with our five kids at Buttonwood farm for fall fun.

There was a giant corn pit.

There were cow rides.

There was a corn maze that we let you littles lead us through.

But I think the child favorite was the large tower of hay bales.

My favorite was catching up with friends & watching our littles interact & play together. It's so crazy to me that we're all grown up (I mean I thought I was all grown up in sixth grade & we ruled the school, but I guess I still had a little growing to do). My childhood girlfriends have become beautiful women with such sweet families. Our conversations have drastically changed since our childhood days. Back then it was how to sneak in a game of tag on the playground even when we weren't supposed to, which boys we were crushing on (a lot of our middle school/high school conversations seemed to center around this), secrets codes only we could understand, how we were going to pass certain tests, & how lame our parents could be (another common middle school/high school topic). We're now worried about some of the same things that our parents had worried about when we were sure that our parents would never understand us. I think one of my favorite lines was "I hated myself as a teenager." This was said as we were talking about how one day you all would be teens & how we all kind of dread it, knowing how difficult we had been during those years. Sigh.

I'm so thankful for my childhood friends. There's something kind of magical about spending time with the people who know where you come from. I love having people I can reminisce with about the enchanted & awkward days of our childhoods. It may sound so simple, but it's something I never thought I would have.

I hope we're able to keep getting together, with or without our littles in tow. I hope we'll continue to talk about our pasts & share our new beginnings. Maybe their kids will become your childhood friends too. Just go easy on your parents! I promise. We're not as lame as you'll think.

I love you so,

Mommy

twinkle toes

Dear Em,
When I was pregnant with you, I went to Toys R Us to purchase a baby shower gift for another friend who was having a baby. I remember so clearly a sweet little girl running around the store with sneakers that lit up as she walked. My pregnant state heightened my already emotional personality, & tears formed in the corners of my eyes. I called your daddy as soon as I left the store to tell him how much I couldn't wait for our little love to someday run around in her very own pair of light up shoes.

I didn't realize then how long I would wait for that day. Although your Nonnie was sure to provide you with an extensive shoe selection at birth, I thought shoes were silly for babies before they could walk. We didn't wait all that long for you to begin toddling around in a variety of shoe options, but I kind of forgot about my light up shoe dreams. I mean, you are my shoe girl. So you've definitely had some fun options, but I guess we never shoe shopped in a store that carried the light up shoes. Instead you pleaded for sneakers with sparkles, boots with bows, & shiny dress shoes.

Until this year.

After watching a little run by with lights flashing from her feet last year, I made it my mission to fulfill my dream with this year's school shoes. We went school shopping at the Wrentham Outlets & happily left with your very own pair of twinkle toes from Sketchers (& also a pair of bella ballerinas for your twirling delight...it was buy one get one 1/2 off).

You spent the first two weeks with your new sneakers looking down at your feet as you walked & stomping like you were marching in the military. I can't tell you how many walls you walked into. "Are you sure those are not too distracting for  her to wear for school," your daddy asked me with a nervous why-can't-you-just-buy-her-normal-sneakers look on his face. Crap, I didn't really think about that. But the sneakers were on your feet. In fact, you had been a model citizen as you got ready for school that morning with the bribe that you could wear your new shoes. They was no way you were going to let us take them off your feet. I worried you might try to sleep in them.

I sheepishly apologized to your teachers when I dropped you off at school. "Oh! We love twinkle toes," your sweet teacher assured me. Actually, it seems like almost everyone loves twinkle toes. They're definitely something that people notice...in the supermarket, while Apple picking, on the tram ride up Cannon Mountain. It's been a conversation starter with many strangers, & they really seem to make people smile. Many people have taken to calling you twinkle toes. I love it, because it's not just your toes that twinkle. Your shoes just match your fun-loving & hilarious little personality.

So while you may not always wear shoes that light up, you will always be my twinkle toes.

I love you so,
Mommy

Our New Hampshire Adventure 2013

Dear Em,
On Wednesday when I picked you up from school, you announced to me that you were ready to head to New Hampshire. It was a surprise to me since we weren't planing on leaving until the next afternoon. I explained to you that we didn't have Daddy with us. Wouldn't he be sad if we left for New Hampshire without him? You said he would come later in his car. I countered with the fact that we had no accommodations for that night. You told me there were plenty of places to sleep in New Hampshire. In desperation I told you that we hadn't packed yet. You wouldn't have any clothing or shoe options. I should have known that you would see reason in fashion. You agreed that we should go home at once & begin packing.

You weren't satisfied until the packing was underway. At one point it felt like we were bringing half of our house, at least half of what belonged to you. You brought down piles of toys & books to be packed in the car, some for you & some for your best friend S. This year S & her family would be joining us on our adventure, & you were both beyond excited about it.

We spent the first night & next day in New Hampshire as just our family of three. We picked you up at 1pm from school. It seemed that everyone knew you were going to New Hampshire as they all said bye. The weather & the foliage were beyond amazing on the drive up. The weather was projected to be in the mid to high 70s. It was a little warmer than I would have liked. My perfect New Hampshire weekend would be one with crisp fall weather so we could snuggle next to a fire. It also caused me to pack fall & summer clothing options, making me feel even more like we were bringing our whole house to New Hampshire. I really shouldn't have complained. Every other year had been full of rain.

When we arrived, we picked up a few things at the local grocery store. The grocery store sat at the base of Loon Mountain. It took my breath away how beautiful it was to do something as ordinary as grocery shopping here. I couldn't help but take a few photos of you, and you were happy to be the subject of my photos. The car ride was a long one for you. When you weren't sleeping, you were asking how many more minutes until we arrived in New Hampshire (which you had been asking since your daddy dropped you off at school that morning). You were just as happy as I was to be enjoying the sights & smells.

We brought take-out back to the condo (same one as last year) for dinner & enjoyed sitting by the fire, just the three of us, that night. Daddy & I put you to bed together. We all snuggled in the bottom bunk bed while Daddy read you one book & I read you another. You were in New Hampshire heaven.

After you drifted off to sleep, Daddy & I sat outside on the back deck. We spent most of the night enjoying the fresh air, the sound of the river, & the star filled sky. We talked about you. We talked about the past five years. We talked about the future. We did something we hadn't done since our honeymoon five years ago: we smoked a cigar (it sounds so gross, I know, but it's a surprisingly nice way to celebrate).

The next morning, you actually let us sleep in until 7:30. I could really get used to New Hampshire living. You & I started to get ready while Daddy picked up breakfast from White Mountain Bagel (I crave their sun dried tomato bagels with bacon & horseradish cream cheese all freaking year). We left the condo fairly early for a morning of New Hampshire fun. Our first stop was the Basin. We had last walked the Basin during your first trip to New Hampshire two years ago. We were sad to realize you don't really remember that trip or the way we would say "the Basin" in a really low toned voice & you would reply with "the Baby Basin" in the same low tone. Still, it was so much fun to watch you run & climb & explore & laugh & play.

Walking the Basin can be exhausting.

The water was COLD!

One of your favorite parts was getting to walk underneath the highway. We took turns making echos.

After the Basin, we headed to Cannon Mountain with a promise to you that we would eat lunch at the top (we had packed a lunch for you). You were very excited about traveling to the top of the mountain & proclaimed that you had great climbing skills. When we loaded into a yellow tram (which is fondly called Mustard, the red one is named Ketchup), you sadly pouted. "But I wanted to climb the mountain." The other 30 people squeezed into the tram with us erupted into laughter.

Once we reached the top, you enjoyed your lunch with a gorgeous view of Cannon Mountain. It was breathtaking, & the foliage was at it's peak. Our views reached all the way to Canada, which was surprising since the rain clouds had rolled in. When we felt the first raindrops, I was kicking myself for complaining about the projected warm & sunny weather.

We didn't let the weather get in our way. There was a hiking trail that led from the lodge to a viewing tower higher up on the mountain. You were excited to show us your "hiking skills," getting down on all fours to traverse the land even when it was completely flat.

We stopped at a lot of quiet areas off the main path to take in the view, just the three of us. Of course I started to snap pictures of everything, wanting to save every bit of beauty for always. You wanted to take some pictures too. For the first time, Daddy & I had a little photographer to take pictures of us. You got some great shots, sometimes instructing us how to pose. "Ok, now you need to hug. Ok. Ok. Now you have to kiss."

Can you see my iPhone in your hand? It was your camera of choice.

When we reached the top, we were proud of you for being able to do the whole hike. You were proud of you too. I couldn't imagine a better way for Daddy & I to spend our anniversary than to be able to take in the views as our little family of three.

We got to ride Ketchup back down the mountain & headed back to the condo for a much needed nap for all. Although we were all a little worn out (& the RedSox were playing their first playoff game), we headed out to dinner. It was our five year anniversary, after all. We chose The Common Man Inn for dinner. We had fed you before leaving. You have a limited pallet, & we figured it would be better to feed you before & just order you dessert than to order you a meal that you wouldn't end up eating. It was the perfect restaurant for littles. There was a cheese & cracker spread that you were excited to keep going back to (for the crackers, not the cheese), you got a picture to color with crayons, the staff was so sweet to you, & your dessert was amazing. Our food was amazing too.

You were bouncing with excitement that S would be arriving that night. Since they arrived late, you went to bed late. Daddy & I were a little worried about the full day at Santa's Village planned for the next day, but we went to bed soon after you trying to get as much rest in as possible.

You & S woke up early the next morning. You also woke up kind of cranky, which was to be expected. It had been a late night for you. It was funny to later realize we spent the morning having some of the same conversations with you that S's parents had with her. "If this is how you're going to act, then we'll stay home & everyone else will go to Santa's Village." There were lots of "Santa is watching you" threats being thrown around that morning. There's something amazing about being friends with great parents of incredible kids & finding out that they go through a lot of the same experiences that we do. It makes my heart happy when we get to travel with amazing families & makes me feel a little less like an awful parent when our child is not perfect during every moment of our vacation.

We offered to drive both you & S so that you could watch a movie in the DVD player in our car. Instead, the two of you argued & debated over selling your toys to each other. A little plastic toy was going for two hundred thousand dollars, & you were both crying that you didn't have two hundred thousand dollars. Sigh. I was happy when we pulled into the Santas Village parking lot.

I think we could have spent the whole day outside the gates. You enjoyed talking to Rudolf, who talked right back. I enjoyed taking family photos.

Santa's Village is one of the stinkin' cutest places I've ever been to. The theme is carried out EVERYWHERE. Even the chairs were cupcakes & the garbage cans were penguins & snowmen. I was thrilled to see that the park included the real meaning of Christmas, Jesus' birth. You were thrilled to see roller coasters & flumes & spinning rides. Our little love is a little thrill seeker. Once inside, we hit almost every single ride in the park, stopping only to eat the lunches we had packed & get your alphabet cards punched for a secret surprise. I held on for dear life while you patted my back & told me it would be fun.

You & S got to drive cars...through a car wash.

If we had let you, you would have rode the roller coaster all day. Even after four times, you cried that you had to get off.

Feeding Santa's Reindeer was a highlight of the day.

You were so excited to see baby Jesus.

You couldn't wait to tell Santa that you wanted an American Girl Doll for Christmas. Too bad you originally told us you wanted to bike. Oh, well. At least we got to check off the obligatory sitting on Santa's lap pictures super early this year.

It was a full day of fun. You & S were both amazing, which was a surprise to all after our cranky start. We headed back to the condo, exhausted but with happy hearts. You slept the whole drive back. We unanimously agreed to get takeout instead of going out for dinner. Grandma & Papa joined us for the fun (they were vacationing in New Hampshire that weekend too). After dinner, the guys & Grandma watched the RedSox playoff game, while the ladies headed to the pool & hot tub.

You had recently watched Lilo & Stitch & wanted to swim under the water like Lilo does. So, for your very first time you did, all by yourself (you swallowed half the pool & I finally had to beg you to stop swimming under water for fear of dry drowning). It made my heart swoon to watch you & S swimming around together. I could have watched you forever, & the two of you would have swam forever. But it had been a long day & us mom's looked forward to the dads taking over bedtime duty. We also looked forward to sitting out on the deck & playing some board games, just the parents. Mostly, we talked about you & S, how much we love you, & how much we love that you're such a special part of each other's lives.

The next morning, it was clear we were all exhausted. You & S were fighting over the top spot for crankiest little girl in America (I mean this literally, that's what you were actually fighting over). We packed up our things, sadly said goodbye to the condo, & headed to Clark's Trading Post for a quick visit before driving home. We purchased some fudge & a bag of rocks that you could add to the bag you bought two years ago. You talked forever about how glad you were that your old rocks wouldn't be lonely & how you were going to take good care of them (you've already brought them in for show & tell). Then we sleepily headed home. You & I napped while Daddy drove. You napped the entire drive, announcing that the drive wasn't long at all when we pulled into our driveway.

It was hard to say goodbye to our New Hampshire adventure, especially because I think this one was my favorite one yet. I love that we were able to share our happy (& sometimes unbearably frustrating) moments with such great friends. At the same time, it felt so good to be home.

Thank you, my dear little love, for such a precious weekend filled with beautiful memories. It is a tradition that I hold so close to my heart. I look forward to next year's adventure & all the years after that.

I love you so,
Mommy