"You're my back bone.
You're my corner stone.
You're my crutch when my legs stop moving.
You're my head start.
You're my rugged heart.
You're the pulse that I've always needed..."
- Phillip Phillips "Gone Gone Gone"
I had a rough week this week. During one particularly disappointing day, where nothing seemed to go right, I felt wounded. I spent the better part of my day fighting an overpowering feeling to just let go & cry before going to pick you up from school. You're eyes lit up when you saw me enter your classroom doorway, & it warmed my heart. "Mommy," you squealed. "Come see my bear tower!" I walked over to see the Magna-tiles tower you had built. You opened the top part of the tower to show me tons of bears "that lived inside." You beamed with pride. I think I kinda beamed too.
You started putting away the Magna-tiles & the bears. You told me that I could help. As we finished up putting everything in it's correct bin, you told me "we make a great team." Then you told me "we should high five." You gave me a precious high five before we left school & headed outside. You snuggled me in tight as we walked through the parking lot to the car, as if you knew I truly needed it.
We drove to meet Daddy. He walked out the front door to meet us. His eyes were understanding, & his arms were open. He knew what I needed at that moment. He let me just bury my head in his chest & stand there for a moment. He also had reenforcements. He held up a box of macaroons (my favorite) for me.
So, I took a deep breath, let it it go, went inside with my family, & ate dinner. We talked, & we laughed. We took you to gymnastics & watched you do the perfect frontward roll. I couldn't help but feel like my seemingly disastrous day wasn't really a big darn deal. Am I still disappointed? For sure. But this is what is important- Magna-tile towers, high fives, dinnertime together, laughter, perfect forward rolls, & a family that holds me close when I need it. It was a rough day, & there will be more rough days ahead, but as long as I have you & Daddy I have all I need. Thanks for that.
I love you so,