love letters

Dear Em,

"Ohana means family. I have one of those!"

- Emma McGovern, 3 years old

Remember how I said you were learning French & Spanish? Well, thanks to the movie Lilo & Stitch, you've been learning a little Hawaiian too. Today is all about Ohana, because after school & work today we're making the trip down to North Carolina to visit my family. I'm so excited we have a full week to be all together!

I've been a little absent from the blog this week because between work projects, your last week of school, planning your 3.5 birthday party, gatherings with friends, & packing for a week-long trip I think I bit off a little more than I could chew. But you know what? It all got done in the end, & now I can just enjoy & appreciate your last day of school.

You made it through another school year. This year has been full of changes & transitions for you. It hasn't always been easy, but I can't believe how much you've learned & grown. What a difference a year makes.

Last Day of School 2012:

Last Day of School 2013:

I love you so,

Mommy

Knowing Spanish

Dear Em,
Living with you means at any given moment, we will have something to smile & laugh about. Take the other day for instance...

Em: "Español. Mommy & Daddy, español!"
Me: "That's right. That means Spanish."
Em: "I know Spanish."
Me: "That's great! What words do you know in Spanish?"
Em: "Well, I just know Spanish."
Me: "Ok, well, for instance agua is Spanish for water."
Em: "Water is Spanish?"
Daddy: <Laughing>
Me: "No, agua is the Spanish word for water."
Em: "Well, I just know Spanish."
Me: <giving up on the language lesson>"Ok, that's great."

When you speak to us in a language you have made up & only you understand, sometimes you tell us that is Spanish. Although none of the books we own are in Spanish, sometimes you tell us some of yours are in Spanish. You read them to us proudly in your made up language. We don't understand the story line at all, but I don't know Spanish. So, I guess I wouldn't understand the story lines even if you were really reading them to us in Spanish.

I don't know who we have to thank, Dora the explorer or your teachers at school. I mean, it's pretty clear, you're almost bilingual...at least you think so. Through reading Fancy Nancy books you've also learned to say French words like "oui" & "bon appétit." Is there such a thing as triple-lingual?! 

Joking aside, you know Spanish & French (although I don't know that you know it's French) exists & that makes you more knowledgeable about other languages than I was at your age. And in a world where most other countries are far ahead of us in learning languages other than their native ones, I think you're on the right track.

I love you so,
Mommy

How a Three Year Old Says: "Mom, your shorts are too short."

Dear Em,
Sometimes I feel like we're a family of bears. It's not that we're nasty & wild & tear things apart (although sometimes we do). It's just that it's almost like we hibernate during the winter. We don't sleep from November until April (although, sometimes I feel like I would like to), but our activity levels & outside time decrease a lot. We spend much of our winters bundled up inside & are ready to don shorts & sundresses on the first 60 degree day.

We've been thrilled to make the most of our Spring by getting outside as much as we can. One of our favorite activities to return to is bike riding on the South County Bike Path. Towing a little love behind you always makes it a little more challenging of a workout. As you've grown bigger each year, each year the workout gets a little more challenging. Your daddy & I take turns towing you. One of us tows you the four miles to the park where we picnic & play, & one of us tows you back.

Last week, we had one of our warmest summer days. We agreed to pack a dinner picnic & go for a bike ride after work. In preparation for the heat, I dressed in shorts & a t-shirt. You apparently did not approve of my outfit. "Mommy, you're naked! Put some clothes on!" I looked down to make sure this wasn't a major case of Mommy-Brain. Nope, I had remembered to put on all my clothes. All necessary body parts were covered.

"Em, I'm wearing clothes. See, these are shorts?" You looked at me & rolled your eyes exasperated. "No, Mommy, you're naked. You need to put on more clothes." This aparently would be the first of many times in our lives that you are embarassed by my clothing choices.

Regardless, we had a great family bike ride & picnic.

Daddy brought macaroons for desert. Sooooo stinkin' yummy.

You're getting so big. I remember how scared we used to be when you wanted to climb this.

At the end of our ride, you & I stretched together.

And sure, you called me naked at least six or seven more times during our bike ride & picnic. Apparently, that's your very tactful way of telling me you think my shorts are too short.

I love you so,

Mommy

Toes Behind You

Dear Em,
We were driving home from school last week. The music was on, but I was totally in my head. I had gotten some bummer news that day, & I was kind of on auto-pilot as I replayed it in my mind again & again.

Your little voice broke through the clouds in my head. "Mom, toes behind you." What?! I checked my review mirror to see what if anything was traveling behind our car that you could be talking about. "Mom, you like toes, right? Toes behind you." I looked down & to my right. There I saw your outstretched bare foot, placed on the armrest like a present for me. "Want some toes, Mom?" You had a huge, sweet grin on your face.

Leave it to you to pull me out of my head & put a smile on my face. I tickled your little toes & yelled "TOES!" in a big monster voice. We spent the rest of the ride home giggling as you reached out one foot & then the other.

Even on the most frustrating days, I've got TOES! AND really, Who needs anything else?

I love you so,
Mommy

My Mini-Me

Dear Em,
I found a comfortable black & white striped sundress at Old Navy this year, & you were thrilled when we found you a black & white striped sundress at Target. For better or for worse, you are my mini-me. People ask your daddy & I who you take after. Your daddy smiles as he says "she's all Julie." You're not soft spoken, & I've seen it get you into trouble just as I've gotten in trouble for sometimes not knowing when to hold back from speaking my mind. You're incredibly stubborn & strong willed. At the same time, you have a quiet sensitivity. Your confidence is easily shaken. You're incredibly curious & serious, wanting to know how things work & why- wanting to try things out for yourself. You also have such a fun side, loving to sing & dance & tell (bad) jokes.

It breaks my heart to think that someday you will have a hard time with & detest some of the traits that take after me (your wide feet will probably top that list). But for now, you're thrilled when you can be "just like Mommy." This past weekend you got to dress just like mommy as we both wore our black & white striped dresses. You buzzed with happiness. I wasn't even allowed to put on a cardigan without you pouting that we were supposed to be exactly the same.

We headed to what you refer to as the big city (Providence) to have lunch at Duck & Bunny. I wasn't surprised to find that my mini-me loves my favorite Rhode Island snuggery just as much as I do. Then again, who doesn't love yummy crepes & cupcakes? We were lucky to be able to sit in the garden area outside & played Old Maid while we waited for our food.

After lunch, we headed a few miles away to the Hope Street Block Party. I get a weekly email from Rhode Island Monthly listing 5 events going on each weekend. When our weekends aren't already planned, I love checking out some of activities & events offered throughout the state. I love trying new things. So does my mini-me. It didn't matter that you didn't know anyone else at the block party other than Daddy & I. You dove right into the activities. You had a blast decorating a cookie, watching an alien marching band, blowing bubbles, eating Dels, dancing, driving a firetruck, & carrying around a red balloon. I loved that it was all free- such an incredible event for the community.

You joined a dance class but made it pretty clear that you came with your very own moves. I love that you didn't worry about being like everyone else. I also worry that you got your unique dance rhythm (or lack there of) from me.

"But I didn't even get to play with any blocks," you whimpered as we drove home. As much as we tried, you didn't understand the whole BLOCK party concept. Still, you didn't want to leave all the fun. I was sad to leave too. I loved watching you explore & dive into the day. 

There may be a day when you're frustrated with how similar we are, where you choose to see the differences more than the similarities. That's OK. There are a lot of traits I hope you don't get from me. But for now, I'm relishing the fact that my mini-me looks up to & wants to be just like her mommy.

I love you so,

Mommy

"God, please don't let there be rain in the sky."

Dear Em,
Once we finally started to get some non-winter weather, it's been a beautiful Spring in Rhode Island. We've had plenty of beautiful, sunshiney days with no humidity. It's my favorite weather for activities that don't involve the pool or beach. We've also had plenty of rain- which is fine. We need rain for the flowers to bloom & for our grass to be the perfect green that Daddy likes. The unpredictable weather does make it difficult to plan outdoor activities- like using our new kayaks.

We bought them last weekend in the middle of a rain storm (loading kayaks on your car for the first time in the rain is not ideal), & we've been trying to plan a perfect first kayaking outing since. After a week of questionable weather reports, we decided to go for our first outing at Barber's Pond on Sunday.

After breakfast on Sunday, your daddy looked at the weather report. Uh-oh. While the sun was shining at that moment, it looked like rain was headed our way. We rushed to get dressed, pack a picnic, get the kayaks on the car, & load the car with everything else we would need. Just as we finished packing everything into the car, the clouds rolled in.

Should we just unload & try another day? Should we chance it? I quickly ran back into our house to grab some rain jackets as we decided we would still go & hope for the best. I began to pull out of the driveway & heard your little voice behind me. "God, please don't let there be rain in the sky." You were looking out the window at the clouds, a hopeful expression filling your face. It was the sweetest little thing, & my heart swelled. Of course when you're not sure what to do, what can you do but pray?

God answered your prayers. We had perfect weather for our first family kayaking adventure- clouds sprinkled with sunshine. You & I shared the tandem kayak, & I couldn't have been happier with my adorable view.

Not knowing how you would do, we let you take a few toys along on the adventure. Your babies joined in on the fun. You sang "The Wheels on the Bus" as you splashed them in & out of the water. Ultimately, you got a little upset with them for "splashing water" on your pants.

Barber's Pond is small. It was perfect for a first outing. We easily paddled from one end to the other. You put your feet up as you yelled for me to paddle "faster!"

We had a blast on our first outing. You wanted to go swimming, & although it was great weather for kayaking, it wasn't really the weather for swimming. We have plenty of time for that, though. I see lots & lots of kayaking adventures filling our summer- God & weather willing.

I love you so,

Mommy

First Haircut

Dear Em,
We've been trying to talk to you about getting your first haircut for months. I say TRYING because every time we've broached the topic, you started screaming NO, threw yourself down on the floor, & began kicking your feet in the hair. "I'm not saying we're going to get your hair cut right now. I'm just asking you to think about it," I would plead through the screams.

Then, out of the blue, you walked up to me one morning & said, "Mommy, I'm ready to go get my haircut." I think my mouth dropped open in shock. "What made you change your mind," I asked. "Well, Daddy says I can watch TV while I get my haircut," you simply replied with a sweet smile. I silently rejoiced that you had finally agreed to a haircut while simultaneously started stressing out about trying to find a place that has TVs at every station (of course it would be the promise of TV that would change your mind). "MO-OM, are we going? I'm ready to get my haircut right noooooow," you snapped me out of the silent conversation I was having with myself in my head. Once you make up your mind, there's no messing around. You want to do what you want to do now.

That was Mother's Day morning at 8am. For a quick moment I thought about trying to squeeze it in that day. There was just no way. We had a full day planned, & I wasn't sure where I was going to take you. I spent the next couple days thoroughly researching different kids spots. Most don't include on their websites whether or not they have TVs, but I used the images function on Google to find pictures of the insides of each place. I knew that no TV would mean no haircut.

I finally settled on Kidz Adventure Cuts, & as a present to myself I took you for your very first haircut on my birthday. You loved the place the moment you walked in. There was a table with toys to play with in the waiting area, & each staton had its very own colorful TV. You oooohed & awwwed & bounced around until the hairdresser called your name. At that moment I think it sunk in for you what you were about to do. You clung to me & whimpered. I held your hand & promised I would be with you the whole time.

I have to say once got to to the hair-washing sink, I was pretty worried that the whole thing wasn't going to happen. I sat you down in the chair, & you started to throw a fit. The hairdresser (Dawn) was amazing. She talked you through the process calmly & step by step until you were laying your head down, getting your hair washed. "This is so cool mom," you smiled.

I was absolutely amazed by how great Dawn was at cutting hair with a moving child. You claim that you stayed very still & didn't move at all. You were great, as great as I could have expected, but you still moved your head all over. You looked from thing to thing in the sensory filled room & asked to hold every toy in eyesight. She seamlessly handed toy after toy to you while trimming your hair in an even line. This woman was a miracle worker.

Of course, you had to choose to watch Caillou during your first hair cut. I can't stand that whiney kid.

After your haircut, you got your hair blow-dried so that we could see the full look.

Once you finished, you got to pick a prize out of a whole chest full of prizes. Then they gave me a precious little certificate commemorating your first hair cut with a lock of your newly cut hair.

It's not a drastic change. Just a trim off the bottom to get rid of the dead, tangly ends & angled sides so your hair won't be on your face. You love it. There were lots of twirls & smiles as you asked me if I noticed anything different & if you were beautiful. Of course. You are always beautiful.

The next morning you woke up, ran into my room, & said "Mommy, I'm ready for another haircut." "But you just got one yesterday," I said quizzically. "Don't you know Mom?! You get your hair cut & let it grow, & get your hair cut & let it grow, & get your hair cut. I let it grow last night & now I need another hair cut." Oh geeze. I think we created a hair cutting monster.

I love you so,
Mommy

How old should a child be when they start doing chores?

Dear Em,
Daddy says he never really had chores as a child. In my family, we grew up doing chores. There was laundry folding, vacuuming, & dishes. Since there were so many of us, we all rotated in our tasks.  I'm not sure how old we were when we started doing chores, but I remember doing them until I moved out of my parents' house. I think every family probably does things a little differently, & I don't think your daddy & I really decided for sure what the protocol was going to be for our family.

You're at an age where grown-up tasks interest you. If I ask you to clean up your toys, you're about as thrilled as if I asked you to go to bed (sometimes I think you'd rather go to bed). You'll do it, but it's definitely not your favorite. On the other hand, you're eager to help out with our tasks. While I'm cleaning the bathroom, you beg to help. Clorox wipes in your hands make me nervous, but I will give you a paper towel & tell you you can help by "dusting." You dust EVERYTHING- the floors, our beds, the cats- EVERYTHING. You're always underfoot as Daddy sweeps the floors. You smile from ear to ear when Daddy gives you a brush & dustpan outside of the area he's directly sweeping & lets you "sweep." They're not real cleaning activities, as you're still too young to dust or sweep without missing spots or making bigger messes. Mostly they're just tasks to distract you from making bigger messes while we're cleaning up.

A few weeks ago I was putting the groceries away & starting dinner. I gave you the option of playing in the backyard, but you were having one of those moments where you didn't want to play on your own. You whined at my feet & I tried not to trip over you while I rushed around the kitchen. As I looked at the pile of cardboard, bottles, & cans on our kitchen counter, I had an idea. I asked you to take the items out to the recycling bins. You were excited about the task, & since you took each item separately the task distracted you long enough for me to finish the things I needed to get done.

I've often had the question & have been asked the question "how old should the child be when s/he is ready for..." The funny thing about you is more often than not you tell us or show us when you're ready. At six weeks old you showed us you were ready to sleep in your crib by crying until we put you in it. You showed us you were ready to potty train by basically picking it up in a weekend. You showed us you were ready to dress yourself by telling us firmly that you want to dress yourself ("Is it a deal, mom? I can dress myself?" you pleaded). And now, kind of by accident, you've showed us that you're ready to have a chore.

It's now your job to take out the recycling. It's not a task you do quickly (you still mostly take things outside one at a time), but it's still a task that's all your own & one that you look so proud to do. I like that you have a chore of your own. You're learning about the importance of helping out at home & more about the importance of recycling without even realizing it.

I really can't wait until you're old enough to handle the vacuuming & laundry...just kidding...well, kinda kidding.

I love you so,
Mommy

I'm on a Boat

Dear Em,
I turned 32 today. How is that possible?!

This year your daddy has really outdone himself with gifts & planning mother's day & birthday-week (that's right, we celebrate all week long) surprises. I was wicked spoiled with my joint Mother's Day & birthday gift: kayaks for the family. It's crazy pricey when you factor in the car rack, the life jackets, & the paddles on top of buying the kayaks. We're looking at it as an investment. It's an investment in family time & adventures for so many years. I'm so excited about the places we'll explore together & the sunshine & fresh air we'll enjoy with these.

You had one requirement when it came to the purchase: you had to have a pink life jacket. Things got a little dicey when we thought they had run out of pink, but in the end good prevailed over evil & you got your pink wish. You're wicked excited. So far you've only sat in the kayaks on land, but that doesn't stop your giddiness. I don't think I'm going to be able to sit in the kayaks without singing the song, "I'm on a Boat" in my head...& maybe sometimes out loud. Got your flippy floppies?

While it's hard to believe how fast the years are flying by, I'm not sad to celebrate another year gone by. This year brought us too many amazing moments and adventures to name.  I'm beyond excited for the gift of a whole new year. With or without presents & celebrations, please know that you, your daddy, our family, & friends are my greatest treasure. You've all filled the past 32 years with such amazing memories. It may feel a little crazy sometimes, but I love you all & I love our life. So, here's to year 33 & all of the adventures that lay ahead.

I love you so,

Mommy

fire pits & s'more kisses

Dear Em,
On Friday we celebrated Grandma's birthday. She & Grandpa came over to our house for dinner & fun in the backyard. I just love our backyard, especially in the spring & summer. We're so fortunate to have such a wide open, green, & quiet space.

We ate dinner on the back deck. You & Grandma & Papa played an adorable game of t ball. I love your baseball swing. You follow through on every swing like Big Papi does after he's hit a home run. It's so stinkin' cute.

We started a fire in the fire pit. You roasted your first marshmallows for s'mores. I enjoyed watching you eat the s'mores more than eating them myself. The gooey chocolate & marshmallow spread across your sweet little face. You definitely have a sweet tooth.

As the sky grew dark, we used the light of the fire pit & your lantern to play hide & go seek in the backyard. I was amazed & proud of how well you were playing. I couldn't believe you were able to find me every time. That was until halfway through when Daddy told me you hadn't been closing your eyes while I hid & you counted. You're pretty sneaky for a three year old.

We let you stay up way past bedtime, & we paid for it dearly with your grouchiness over the next two days. But it was worth it to watch your big smiles & to get your s'mores kisses.

I love you so,
Mommy

now, that is good fashion

Dear Em,
Here you are, 3 years & 4 months old.

Your fashion choice of the moment? A bathing suit & my brown boots. Oh, how I love you so very much at this exact moment (& every moment). My heart feels like it could burst.

I love you so,

Mommy

we have green thumbs...kinda

Dear Em,
Remember this past fall when you & I planted tulips & hyacinths? I have to confess, I never thought they were actually going to grow. I know I put on a brave face when we planted them, but like I've stated before, I don't really have a very good track record when it comes to green things. I think I was just as surprised as you when we started to see things sprout. The look on your face mirrored the feeling in my heart as we watched our tulips & hyacinths grow & change little by little each day.

It's an exhilarating experience for me to watch flowers grow & bloom & know that we had a part in planting them. You are just tickled to see the different colors come up. It makes us all smile as you "ooooh" & "awww" over each newly discovered flower.

I think dandelions are still your favorite, maybe because we let you pick all the dandelions you want. Maybe it's because you love blowing the dried ones into the air & watching them dance to the ground. I remember making wishes on dried dandelions when I was a girl.

Our little herb garden is not doing as well. We went away for a week & came back to find two of our five herb plants pretty shriveled up. Will they come back with sun, water, & love? No clue. I pretty much have no idea what I'm doing.

At least I know that every spring we have tulips & hyacinths to look forward to. They will always make me think of you, just two years old, & the sunny day in fall that we planted our very first bulbs together.

I love you so,

Mommy

waking up on your own

Dear Em,
It was almost a year ago that you switched from a crib to a big girl bed. Ever since, we've listened to you call "Mom! Dad!" every morning as you woke. You would continue to call until we opened the door of your bedroom or called back & told you to come out of your room. I don't know why you felt you needed to do this. We never told you you had to stay in your bed until we told you you could get out. It's just what you did.

Sigh, until this morning.

This morning I woke up to the sound of you tugging at your door knob, the pitter patter of your feet going down the hall, & the toilet flushing. This was the first morning you didn't call out for us. It made my heart happy. You're growing up. I can almost picture you walking downstairs, turning the cartoons on, & pouring yourself a bowl of cereal. I can't say your daddy & I won't relish every extra moment of precious sleep. There were days as you called out to me before dawn that I wished I went by any other name than "Mom!"

But yet, I'm a little bit sad, because...well, because you're growing up. This is the end of yet another stage. I know all too soon our tradition of you climbing into our bed on Saturday & Sunday mornings & snuggling while you watch cartoons & daddy & I try to catch a few more moments of sleep will end someday too. These days just seem to go by so fast, & you seem to be growing up even faster. I want to take every moment I can to snuggle you in & just take you in as you are: Emma, age 3 & 4.5 months. Because you'll never quite be the same as you were at this moment right now.

I love you so,
Mommy

playing catch phrase with a three year old

Dear Em,
Your daddy & I love catch phrase. It's been the fun that fills many late nights with friends & family & has kept us going during many road trips. Now, you want to play too.

It's an electronic game. You hold the circle shaped device (which you call your computer) & a word will show on the small screen. You have to describe the word without saying any part of the word. Then you pass it to the next person & they do the same with a new word. When times is up a buzzer goes off, & points are awarded to the team who is not holding the device when the buzzer goes off.

It's a little tougher to play catch phrase with a three year old than it is with most adults.
- Firstly, it's difficult to find a word you might know. While I think you have a stellar vocabulary, you don't know most pop culture names or car parts or moments in history. Mostly, we keep with the "items in the home" category & skip until we find words you may know.
- Secondly, you can't read. So, catch phrase is pretty much one way with us describing & you guessing the whole time.
- Lastly, your powers of imagination are much stronger than ours, leaving you to make guesses that don't really make sense to most non-three year olds.

Some examples...

Word= Manger
Daddy: What does baby Jesus sleep in?
Emma: A Nest!

Word= Anteater
Daddy: (after a lot of unsuccessful clues) I know I'm breaking all the rules, but these animals eat a lot of ants.
Emma: You're breaking all the rules! (that was your guess, you weren't yelling at him for breaking the rules)

Word= Lawnmower
Mommy: Daddy drives this to cut the grass.
Emma: A mowlawn!

Word= Glasses
Daddy: Sometimes people put these on to read.
Emma: A book!
Daddy: Well, you put them on your eyes to read.
Emma: Well, you don't put poop on your eyes. That would be silly.

While it may be tougher to get a correct answer, you certainly have us laughing more than ever. I didn't think catchphrase could get anymore entertaining, but it certainly does with you.

I love you so,
Mommy

music time warp

Dear Em,
We're a music loving family. Your daddy's eyes light up as he recalls leaning against the stage as his favorite bands played while he was in his teens & twenties. You love to sing and dance to your favorite tunes as much as any three year old could. I grew up loving music, & with the guidance of my grandma, I developed an eclectic taste for it. She took me to see the Glen Miller Orchestra & the Chordettes in concert. Her CD shelves were filled with Broadway hits, music from Ireland, & anything else that struck her fancy. As we traveled Prague, I couldn't help but think of my grandma & how much she would have appreciated the different types of music we experienced while we were there.

I felt like I was in a music time warp while in Prague, & predominantly it was an 80s music era. I heard songs like "Freeze Frame" & "Dont' Worry, Be Happy" for the first time in a really long time. I wondered if they were enjoying the music now because they missed it during Communism rule or if Czechoslovakians genuinely love the lyrical genius of the 80s. I also wondered what it must be like for Czechoslovakians to listen to most music in a language other than their native tongue. There were a few songs where I didn't recognize the words, but for the most part all the music was in English.

Prague didn't just stick with the 80s. There were street performers everywhere, performing all kinds of music. It was both fascinating & fun as we walked from place to place.

During my favorite late night, we walked into La Republica, a hip restaurant/bar. There was a sign out front marketing "Live Music." I was interested. Would it be the typical 80s music we had been hearing? Would it be music in Czech? Would it be something altogether different?

I can definitely say I didn't expect what we found.

High above us on a second story stage, there was a four piece band- a banjo, trumpet, tuba, & trombone. The four (adorable) older men were playing Big Band classics like "Sweet Georgia Brown." Your daddy & I did a double take. These are not tunes that are typically associated with hip bars & late night live music events in the US. My heart leapt. Your daddy & I sat at the bar, having a few drinks & making friends with a couple of English travelers. I grinned as I hummed along with the Big Band music I had grown to cherish. I knew almost every song & every word they sang that night.

I again felt like I was in a music time warp, only this time I was transported back to my grandma's kitchen table listening to the music playing on her CD player. Her eyes were so lively as she listened. "Come on Julie, let's boogie," she'd say with a smile.

She would have loved sitting right there with us, talking to the English friends we had made & listening to the Big Band music. I loved every moment of it. It's funny how such a random evening became one of my favorite travel memories.

So, if you're ever in Prague, check out the live music of La Republica. You just might experience a musical time warp of your own.

I love you so,
Mommy