love letters

Dear Em,
There will be times when change is inevitable. You know it's coming & yet it's still not any easier when it comes. While change is what makes life beautiful, it can also be what makes life hard.

On Thursday night, I received sad news about the company I work for. I knew it was coming for almost a month, but that didn't make it any easier to hear it out loud. My company is downsizing by over 60% by the beginning of April.

For the past 5 years, I've been proud to work for my company. Not every day has been perfect, but I've learned & developed so much as a professional. I've worked with some of the most amazing people who have become my friends & have taught me so much. There were things that I wanted to do professionally, & especially this past year, I was given the developmental opportunities to help get me to where I wanted to be.

Now, who knows. And it's kind of scary to not know what I'll be doing in a few months.

"You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. 

Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked.

A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!

Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?

How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...

or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?

Or go around back & sneak in from behind?

Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,

for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind."

- excerpt from Oh, the Places You'll Go by Dr. Seuss.

So, I gave myself a whole day to feel sorry for myself, professionally speaking. I moped. I dwelled. I worried. I gave myself a day, but that's all I get. Worrying & moping & dwelling will do nothing to help the situation. It won't help me professionally, & it won't help our family.

So, today you & I are going to bundle up & get some fresh air. We're going to live this day & the next & the next. I don't know what is going to happen to me professionally, but I know God has a plan for me...for us. Things may not be clear or easy now, but we're going to figure it out. 

I know that as long as I have my family, I have more than most. We're going to be OK.

I love you so,

Mommy